Growing

If you haven't seen or heard from me in awhile, here are some excuses I have -

I've been stuffing my face with sausage and mushroom pizza, vanilla ice-cream smothered with crushed M&M's and ginger ale.

I've been sitting on the couch, allowing the house to get ridiculously mangy, and not really caring about cleaning it.

I've been demanding that my husband please stop eating onions.

I've been sleeping curled up on the couch while my wonderful husband does everything - cooks, lets the dog out, entertains Adeleigh, does the dishes, washes and folds laundry, grocery shops - everything.
I've been told I look a little green. I've been feeling a little green.

I've been telling my husband how amazing and wonderful he is for doing everything - except for eating onions.
I've been asking my husband to drive to all ends of town, to pick up whatever it is I'm craving.
I've been hissing at anyone that gets near my food.

I've been waking up in the middle of the night to munch on Cinnamon Chex.
I've been caught crying while watching car commercials.

I've been thinking about packing for our move in a few weeks, but I haven't been able to get up off the couch.

I've been fantasizing about getting a bigger couch -

We'll need a bigger couch for our bigger home - our 3 bed, 2.5 bath town home that we are moving into next month. And this October, every single one of those 3 bedrooms will belong to someone.....

Because I'm growing. And so is our family!

Sometimes I bribe her

Yes I bribe my child. Don't judge me. I bribe her because it works.

To the child who hasn't eaten anything except a few bites of cheese and a vitamin in three days:
"Hey, Adeleigh. If you eat five bites of your dinner, you can have a scoop of icecream."
The outcome: five more bites of sustenance and one more serving of dairy in a belly that I'm wholeheartedly convinced is starving.

To the child who never, ever eats her veggies:
"Hey, Adeleigh. If you eat that one teensy piece of broccoli on your plate, you can have two chocolate chips."
The outcome: a very dramatic production of facial expressions of disgust while stomaching the smallest broccoli floret ever. And two fewer chocolate chips for me...

To the two-year-old who argues why she should be able to wear her diaper while taking a bath:
"Hey, Adeleigh. If you take your diaper off before sitting down in the tub tonight, you can have five bedtime stories."
The outcome: a toddler that rips her own diaper off and throws it away without throwing a tantrum in the tub, and five bedtime stories.

After a sleepless night of constant interruptions from a toddler who is no longer confined to a crib and can move about the condo at her own free will:
"Hey, Adeleigh. If you stay in your bed all night long tonight, you can have a treat tomorrow morning."

As I'm thinking about what treat I might offer her, the only "treat" we have in the house right now are chocolate chip cookies....And who eats cookies for breakfast?

.......{crickets}........

Certainly not this Mom.  :)

And who lets their children ever eat cookies for breakfast?

If this actually works tonight - Definitely this Mom.

Don't judge.

Horror Story

After a 10-year horror movie strike, I allowed American Horror Story to come into our home.
Biggest. Mistake. Ever.

Phaeton - "So, I'm going to watch a really scary show. If it freaks you out too much, just tell me to turn it off and I'll watch it when you're not here."
Me - "What is it?"
Phaeton - "American Horror Story."
Me - "You can watch it. I'm not really paying attention."

Twenty minutes later -
Me - "!@#$%^&*(!! Holy m$#@#!. This show is messed up."
Phaeton - "Do you want me to turn it off?"
Me - "Ummm...let's just see how the rest of it goes."

Two episodes later -
Me - "Let's watch another one."
Phaeton - "Bedtime."
Me - "Fine. Where's the nightlight?"
Phaeton - "No, don't turn any lights on. I can't sleep with the lights on."
Me - "I'm watching horror shows with you. You owe me. We're sleeping with the lights on."

Five days and eleven episodes later -
Phaeton - "!@#$%.....This show is really messed up."
Me - "I'm done. I can't watch it anymore. It's too disturbing."
Phaeton - "We only have one episode left! You really don't want to finish it with me?!?!"
Me - "I haven't watched horror movies in ten years. I haven't needed a night light in over twenty years. It's been years since I've slept with my head under the covers. I've started doing all of that in the last five days again. I don't want to start getting night terrors like I did when I was little too.....I can't watch it anymore."
Phaeton - "I bet we watch it tomorrow night."

I turned the night lights on and we kissed good night. Phaeton began snoring within seconds. He has that amazing gift. I, on the other hand, couldn't close my eyes. I was too freaked out. I saw a faint light coming from above the covers, so I peeked. The television set was turned on. I stared at it blankly, completely confused at how that happened. Then, it turned off. The remote was sitting on the bedside table.
True story.

I freaked.
Me, shaking my husband awake - "Phaeton! Phaeton!"
Phaeton - "!@#$%  What?!"
Me - "The TV just turned itself on and off."
Phaeton - "Honey. No it didn't. Go to bed."
Me - "Seriously, Honey. I'm not making it up."
Phaeton - "Nubi did it."
Nubi, our cat, sound asleep across the room - "Prrrrrr..."
Me - "Sweetie. Seriously. I'm freaking out right now."
Phaeton - "Honey, go to bed!"
Me - "You don't believe me, do you?"
Phaeton - "Well, I saw someone standing next to the TV, but I thought that was you..................[pause]..................Tee hee hee....."
I shoved him in the arm.
Me - "Not cool."
Phaeton - "Yeah, but that was funny."
Me - "Not really. How are you not freaking out right now?"
Phaeton - "Because it was a nice ghost...And he was probably bored, so he wanted to watch a show. But nothing was on. So he turned it off.....[then Phaeton put two earplugs in]....Good night!"
______

I love my husband a lot. But not enough to watch horror shows with him...Ever. Again.

Back on strike.

Networking & Vinegar

Last week I attended my first networking event for my job. Leading up to it, I was nervous. Networking is hugely out of my comfort zone and I was doing it solo, so I sought out a few words of encouragement from fellow team members.
"You're going to do great!"
"Don't feel like you have to walk away with a ton of business cards or a ton of new contacts."
"It's okay to be a wallflower and let people approach you first."
"This will be a great start to getting you more comfortable."
.....
I walked in, grabbed the first open seat at a table of other young professional women and was instantly greeted by the gal I sat next to. I introduced myself and told the ladies who I was and what I do. They did the same. We helped ourselves to some food. I exchanged business cards with the girl sitting next to me. Then the presentation started.

In the middle of the presentation I remember thinking, I'm doing just fine! This is fun! I was proud of myself for branching out of my comfort zone for a little while. And it was nice to break away from the office for a bit. Then, I started telling myself to not do anything embarrassing. I was sitting toward the front of the room and the way my chair was positioned, everyone in the room had a clear view of my seat. I picked up my water bottle, took a swig, and I thought, That would be such a "Heather thing" to do if you dribbled water down your face right now...Don't dribble water down your face right now, Heather.
...
Success.
I went to set my water bottle back down on the table. That would be such a "Heather thing" to drop your almost full water bottle all over the table right now...Don't do it!
...
...
...
...
"Oh my gosh. I'm so sorry. I didn't mean....Oh my gosh, how embarrassing."
Girl sitting next to me - "Oh no. It's fine. Don't worry about it. Really. No big deal at all."

No, I didn't dribble water down my chin. No, I didn't spill my water bottle all over the table, or all over the girl sitting next to me.
But, as I was pulling my arm back from successfully putting my water bottle down, I "successfully" knocked my plate of half-eaten salad directly upside down onto my suit jacket. Not only was salad and dressing all over me, all over my chair, and all over the floor, but I had spilled salad and dressing all over the girl sitting next to me's ridiculously nice, expensive purse.

That was such a "Heather thing" to do.

But, on the bright side -
It was a good event and gave me some good networking experience. And at least I walked away with a business card. If nothing else but to send the girl sitting next to me an apology email for making her nice, expensive purse smell like vinegar.

Auld Lang Syne

It's 11:15pm, New Year's Eve and my husband just brushed his teeth and crawled into bed.

Me - "What are you doing?"

Phaeton - "I'm going to bed."

Me - "Wait, what? It's New Year's Eve! You're not going to stay up with me?"

Phaeton rolled his eyes, whispered expletives under his breath and stood back up.

Me - "hee hee hee"

Phaeton - "Fine. But we're watching Avengers."

~

I think 2012 was a trying year for many. We definitely had our struggles. But it's been a year of fun, with those we love; and a year of growth, individually and as a family.

Here are a few things we've learned this year -

Adeleigh learned yoga.

And started teaching it.

We learned that onions have purple flowers.

And you don't need toys when you have leaves.

We love leaves.

I learned that the holidays are much more fun with a child around.

And that some of the best moments are captured in your jammies....

...Or maybe at the toy store...

~
We may be finishing the year out with Kleenex up our noses and the smell of cough drops on our breath, but I feel positively about the year ahead.

Auld Lang Syne, 2012. It's been fun.

And they meet

Merry Christmas!

Love, Adeleigh & Kris Kringle

Let's go do something really good

The night of the Newtown tragedy, our family went out to eat. As we were getting ready to leave the restaurant, Adeleigh approached a young boy, smiled and waved at him. He looked up at me and smiled, "She's really nice."
"Thank you. You're really nice too."
"Thanks.........So, my mom was just telling me about the school shooting that happened today."
"Yeah. That's really sad, isn't it."
"Yeah......She also told me about Mitzvahs."
"Oh? What's a Mitzvah?"
"It's a Jewish thing. It's when something awful happens and then you go out and do something really good for the world."


Good idea.

Shouldn't

I can't bring myself to do it - to watch the news. Normally, in times of tragedy, my eyes are glued to the TV, waiting to hear the latest updates.
But, this time.....is different.
When I first learned about the Connecticut tragedy, my heart (physically) hurt. I hung up the phone, put on my coat, left work and called daycare.
"I know she's just fine, Breena. But I just heard about the news and I need you to tell me, 'she's just fine'."
I ended my voicemail and sat in silence in the car until she called me back.

I see the list of victim's names. I see photos and posts about those who were lost. More than anything else, I see the articles and posts about gun laws....
I can't hear about this and help but think that clearly, something is corrupt. We shouldn't have to fear going about our daily lives. We shouldn't have to fear allowing our children to go about theirs. We shouldn't have to feel like our best and safest defense is arming ourselves with (and against) the very thing that we fear.
We shouldn't have to fear one another.

Yet, so many of us do. And yet, tragedies like this keep happening. And the unthinkable just keeps getting more and more.....real.

My heart hurts for those families. My heart hurts for those living with the memories, with that fear, with that sadness. And more than anything else, my heart hurts that too many more parents don't get to snuggle extra close to their little ones tonight.

Someone

This week,

I was reminded of how much I dislike ironing.
I learned that I do deserve to buy myself a new scarf this winter.
I learned that my daughter likes to floss her teeth more than she likes to brush them.
I was introduced to gluten free pumpkin chocolate chip muffins.
I gained 5 pounds.
I learned that Adeleigh is capable of staying at our table while we're out to dinner.
I discovered that there is a sippy cup that doesn't leak.
And this week,
I learned how fragile life can be. And that someone, or some few, really are watching over us.

I'm hugging my husband extra close these days.

When life hands you a booger

sometimes you just need to pick it -

Photo by Jessica Loucks