The boss

Being a Mom has given me a new appreciation for so many things, including - family, work, relationships, on sleep, space, the lack of sleep and space, on getting time for me, or for us, on health, on the importance of having a glass (or 2) of wine with dinner. Having a child has made me realize that all the little stresses and annoyances in life, don't have to be so annoying (especially after the wine has kicked in). All those little things take away from my focus on all of the positive, on all that I have to be grateful for. It's not always easy though. Like, when I'm overwhelmed with work and leave a huge stack of unfinished business at the end of the day, I have to remind myself, It's not you're most important job.

Other than being a full-time Mom, here's my job situation. About 2 months ago, I put in a request to go part-time. I decided that working 40+ hrs/week away from Adeleigh wasn't cutting it. I felt guilty for every moment I couldn't be with her. I felt guilty for every moment where I was thinking about work, focused on anything other than my baby. (This is why Phaeton and I have only gone on 3 dates sans Baby.)
So, the company I work for requires a full-time recruiter. It's a busy job with a high demand and requires a great deal of focus. Going part-time in that job role just isn't an option, and it makes sense. But, I've been feeling that for where I'm at in my life, I can't devote the time, focus and energy to that role that is required. I've been struggling to keep up with the workload because I'm thinking about monkeys instead.

So one day at daycare, Adeleigh choked on a rock. Fortunately, her daycare provider knew exactly what to do and Adeleigh was fine. Whether or not we were okay is up for debate. Both Phaeton and I left work in a panic and when we showed up at daycare to give her a big hug and take her home for the day, there she was, bouncing and giggling and blowing raspberries like nothing had happened. We were both soaked in my tears. A week later, she had that scary-sick spell that made my hair gray. These back-to-back events led us to re-prioritize. Phaeton and I agreed that it was time for me to cut back at work a little bit. But my request for part-time was denied. We knew what our family needed right now, so I quit my job.
My boss and I had a meeting so I could explain what led to my decision. I explained it all. He asked if they created a part-time role within my department, a role with less hours, less stress, less responsibility, would I be interested. After much indecision and pulling my hair out and talking it through and asking for advice, I decided to quiet the background noise and listen to my gut....

Once the icecream in my belly stopped digesting, it all made sense. I can't pinpoint it to a particular thing, but I knew I needed to accept my boss's offer. My new job role and schedule starts this week. And while it will mean a pay cut, it'll give me valuable and more anticipated time with my daughter. I'm okay with that. Because she's my most important, and much cuter, boss.