I must be a Momma because........

...By the time my alarm goes off at 5:30am, I've already been up for at least an hour.
...Our furniture is slowly being replaced by the miniature version.
...Once we've decided to leave the house, it takes us, at minimum, another 45 minutes to get out the door.
...After shopping with Adeleigh in Barnes and Noble, I've come out to find my car doors standing wide open. (Pregnancy brain doesn't end just because pregnancy ends.)
...I can walk up 2 flights of stairs while holding my baby, the diaper bag, dog leash and all 7 bags of groceries. (Do not try this at home.)
...I'm lucky to have gotten one meal in for the day. Meanwhile, my baby has had eight.
...Coffee, chocolate and wine have become a main food group in my pyramid. (This one is not contingent on motherhood status.)
...I am no longer bothered by the incessantly crying baby at the supermarket.
...The house cannot, no matter how hard I try, stay clean for longer than 10 minutes.
...The songs I have stuck in my head throughout the day are "I'm a little teapot" and "Monkeys jumping on the bed."
...Our medical expenses have skyrocketed because I worry that every little bump, sneeze, tear and frown constitutes a doctor's visit.
...Only one person is allowed to lick my face when I say "kiss".
...Our family is bilingual in blowing raspberries.
...Getting out of the house to go check the mail feels like a mini-vacation.
...After breast-pumping in the car, it's not out of the ordinary to step out into public completely exposed after having forgotten to buckle my nursing tank. (Yes, this has happened to me. Fortunately, Phaeton tapped on the window loud enough for me to notice before I walked into Chipotle. Who knows how many people got a looksie first.)
...A poopy diaper deserves a celebration.
...Thunder thighs are considered cute.
...For the last year, my heart has been fuller than it's ever been.
...My husband exceeded all of my expectations of a man when he became a father. He still does.

And finally, I must be a Momma because...
...Despite how challenging it can be, I wouldn't change a thing.

The cutest thighs ever.