Trick-or-----May I please come in?

For Halloween this year, the future mayor of Fort Collins dressed up as a dragon. Trick-or-Treating was her time to mingle, to get to know her neighbors, pet their dogs, play with their watering cans on the deck, throw their basketballs around in the driveway, help herself into their homes, and stare at their scary decorations. And in between each house, she'd pause, inspect her new treat and then run as fast as her little dragon legs could take, while screaming flames of joy at the excitement of it all.

Adeleigh and Ashton

Making friends

Making sure that the goblin decoration doesn't come any closer....

What an adventure.

Milestones

When you become a parent, you spend so much time celebrating your little one's milestones - both small and significant. You look forward to seeing your child reach every new phase of development. You wonder what she'll accomplish tomorrow -

And then she says her first word.

She takes her first steps. 

Cuts her first tooth. 

Sleeps through the night. 

Then she imitates a monkey. 

And celebrates a birthday.

She uses the potty.

She brings home the artwork she created that day. 

And when you ask her to hand you the orange crayon, after scanning a sea of colors, she hands you the orange crayon. 

Then she answers your question with a statement. Carries on a conversation with you. She tells you that "I sleep okay, Mom." And "I'm carrying clothes to Breena's."

Next, she actually seems okay with you walking out the door at daycare. Because she knows now, that you'll be back.

And when you ask her if she'd like to sit on your lap, she tells you "No, thank you" and finds a resting place sitting inside the laundry basket across the room from you.

Bittersweet.

It's all a natural progression of life. Of learning new things. Of becoming independent, and strong. Yet, sometimes I just want to slow it all down.

She's growing up so fast. I think faster than I'm prepared for. And I have to work on reaching some milestones of my own. Some have come more naturally. Some with a fair bit of struggle, and tears. Some are still a work in progress. But just as my little girl's milestones have resulted in a great deal of cognizance and awareness, the milestones we reach as parents deserve their own applause. Or at the very least, a high-five - 

Not that long ago, after being so nervous and unsure of how to even hold a baby, I held her in my arms.

I changed a diaper....successfully. 

I gave her my first bath that didn't end in tears. 

It took awhile, but I took her to a friend's house and actually went on a date with my husband. 

I prevented a temper tantrum and successfully used the power of redirection.

I kissed her owie all better.

I came to terms with the fact that I just can't be with her all day long. 

After over two years, I let that guilt go......

I re-learned how to find pleasure in the simplest things. 

I learned that my capacity to love is endless. 

And today, I learned that sitting in a laundry basket full of clothes on the other side of the room might, at times, be a better idea than sitting on the all-too-familiar, yet always available lap. 

At least she knows I'm close by.

Bittersweet.

A natural way to plumper lips

This evening I was hit in the lip by a golf ball.

I wish it was from some cool story of riding in a cart on my way to the 9th hole; wearing plaid shorts and a pink polo, cardi around my shoulders; with a drink in my hand, teeth-bearing grin on my face; laughing at some ridiculously intellectual joke that my clubhouse friend said.
It wasn't.

Let me explain -
When we take Adeleigh on walks, one of her favorite things to do is to find a rock, wash it and add it to her toy collection. A few months ago, while poking through her favorite rock pile in search of the best one, Adeleigh found the roundest, most unique looking rock of the bunch - a golf ball.
We added it to her suitcase of random toys and every once in awhile, it would come out and we'd roll it across the floor to one another. Phaeton and I thought we had made it abundantly clear that, just like her rocks that she had collected, we don't throw the golf ball.
Well, if you've ever had a 2-year-old, you know that sometimes kids don't listen...

So, this evening, I was hit in the lip by a golf ball.

It was one of those moments where it hurt so bad, that all my brain could think of to do was cry. Which then made Adeleigh cry. And Daddy put her in time-out.
After a few minutes, I was greeted by a teary 2-year-old holding an icy teething ring. She crawled up on my lap, told me she was sorry 10 times, kissed my lip all better and held her teething ring up to my face. I couldn't help but give her a hug. Then she said "I love you, Mom. No throwing."

If you've ever had a 2-year-old, you've learned how quickly you can make amends. You can't stay upset for too long when they do something they shouldn't. Especially when you feel that they have genuinely learned the lesson. But you can try and keep it from happening again.
So, this evening, the golf ball found its new home among other random things -
in the trash can.

_________________________


Here's one thing she can throw -

"I am home. I like it here on Sesame Street."

~Big Bird


Then you should stay, Bird. I like you there too. :)
Most importantly, Adeleigh loves Big Bird. She loves all of her Channel 6 friends. Some days she only sees them for a few minutes. But on days like today, when Adeleigh is sick, we may hunker down on the couch and snuggle through a few shows before taking a mid-morning nap.

I read A Love Letter to PBS this morning. And without getting into politics, it made me realize how much we too would miss PBS if it wasn't there to greet us in the wee hours of the morning, when it's still dark outside, and the pets are still snoring at the foot of the bed. It's become an early morning tradition in our home. And I don't want that to end.

Our love of PBS began when Adeleigh was a baby. There were days where I'd prop Adeleigh in her bouncy seat and turn on Sesame Street, or Dinosaur Train, or Super Why so I could take a quick shower. I remember countless times, poking my head out to check on her, and seeing her eyes wide, glued to the screen, little baby feet kicking wildly in the air. As she grew, I would hear her sweet coos of joy while her friends sang songs with her and introduced her to nature and music and counting.

The shows on PBS are different than other cartoons. They are wholesome and informative and promote early learning. They have fostered a sense of curiosity and imagination in my daughter. And they always make Adeleigh smile.
And that's good enough for me.

Now this may get political - If you want, you can read the PBS statement here. 

Remember what you swore you would never do?

I swore I wouldn't get an epidural.
After 20 hours of excruciating labor and only 1/2 centimeter dilation..........need I say more?

I swore I would stay clothed during labor.
:)
I just couldn't keep them on. And I didn't care who saw. But, as I am reminded by my husband - every time a nurse or midwife walked in the room, I apologized for not having styled my hair that day.

I swore I wouldn't be overprotective of my child.
Define overprotective.....Whatever you thought of, that was me.

I swore I would breastfeed until my child was at least 12 months old.
Unfortunately, my mammary glands had had enough by about 6 months. I kept trying and trying with little to give for another two months. I prolonged the ending of this one. I was mentally not ready to give up nursing at the time my body was.

I swore I wouldn't let my child watch TV until she was two.
It's really only a recommendation by the AAP right? We limit television in the house, but there have been many days where because the TV was on, Mommy got a shower.

I swore I would teach my baby yoga and dreamed we would do it together daily, like on the movie Babies.
It takes about 2 minutes of poses before it becomes a game of toddler limbo and "Ride the Horsie". Apparently there's something about Child's Pose that screams, "CLIMB ON MY BACK!"

I swore I wouldn't ever let my child eat chicken nuggets.
Yeah, I know chickens don't have nuggets. But at least the chickens were cage-free.

I swore I would only feed my child homemade, from scratch food.
We didn't have time do this before she was born. Why I thought I would have extra time to do this after she was here? I dunno.

I swore my child would be the perfect sleeper. If she wasn't, I would be strong enough to let her "cry it out".
A Mom can only take so much pteradactyl screaming before just climbing in the crib too.

I swore I wouldn't ever let my child run around the restaurant while we were out to eat.
Yes, that child that just sat herself at your table and started picking at your food is my daughter. Isn't she adorable? Do you mind if she stays until I finish my wine?



I'm sure I could think of more. In the meantime, I'd love to hear yours!

"A hug is a handshake from the heart"

Author is unknown, but I love that quote. I think that should become Adeleigh's mantra.

It's no secret that Adeleigh is a social butterfly. She'll smile at, approach, take popcorn from, sit on the lap of, and hug just about anyone. She also seems to be very in-tune to those she's approaching. And if they are not receptive to her, she'll generally shy away and move onto another. We've always commended Adeleigh on being so friendly. She (and we) have met some pretty cool people because of her eagerness to make new friends.

This evening, while playing at Bear Fish Park in Old Town Square, Adeleigh approached another mom that was sitting and eating popcorn while watching her daughter climb on Bear. The mom asked me if it was alright that she share her popcorn with Adeleigh. My response was, "As long as you don't mind sharing your popcorn! My little one will approach anyone that has a yummy treat." The mom said, "Oh, our little girl will approach and hug just about anyone and everyone. We've had to have some serious discussions with her about that."
Then, before I could do or say anything else, Adeleigh was off running in another direction with another friend, Andrew whom she just met. I followed them to the historic drinking fountain, then atop the ledge by the flowers, then back to Bear Fish, then back to the fountain. Andrew's parents caught up with us and said it was time to go. Then they told Andrew to "tell Adeleigh 'bye bye'". He did and Adeleigh gave him a hug. But that wasn't sufficient. So, she hugged Andrew's daddy. Then, his mommy. Next, she took off running up the hill and approached a group of about six middle-aged men and women that were all standing in a circle chatting. She welcomed herself into their circle and hugged the first gentleman she saw. Then one by one, she made her way around the entire circle, hugging the legs of all of the strangers. They loved it! They were laughing hysterically and thanking her for the hugs and hugging her back. It was a pretty happy moment.

:)

It's no secret how awesome this city is, the friendly and familiar faces, the laid-back atmosphere, the sense of community we have. But just as any place on earth, our city has its fair share of crazies. (For example, we live right down the street from where a man decided to launch an unidentified flying object that supposedly, but didn't really, hold "Balloon Boy" inside. End example, please.)

Given any other night, I probably wouldn't have had any second thoughts about Adeleigh having hugged so many strangers. But after hearing the other Mom concerned that her daughter is also a "stranger-hugger" and has had "serious discussions" with her about it, it made me wonder, should I be worried about it too? Is it strange that I haven't been concerned about it in the past?
Instead of commending Adeleigh and being proud of her friendliness and warm gestures, should I be more cautious and leery of those she's approaching? After she's just made a group of people smile and laugh, should I be telling her that she's not supposed to do that?
I would certainly hate for her to someday, willingly approach someone she shouldn't, or have a sketchy experience as a result. But, I just don't think I have the heart to try and change the goodness and warmth of her two-year-old, megaton heart.
What do you think? I would love any insight that other Moms and Dads could offer. Should I express concern, either now or at a later age, of my daughter's ease in approaching new faces?

Photo credit - This is not really Adeleigh

dailysquee.com

Two years

Dear Adeleigh,

Happy Birthday! This is the only time in your life that your age will literally double overnight! Daddy pointed that one out. I tried to argue it and find another time that it was possible, but he's right. He is really smart at math, by the way.

So, to celebrate Year 2 of Adeleigh, I decided that you needed to have not just a Birthday - but instead, a Birthday weekend. One, because you deserve it. Two, because it's taking me a little time to wrap my head around the fact that you're two! It's just not possible for me to consolidate all of the realizations and emotions of this moment into one 24-hour period.

The day

When you woke up this morning, I asked you what you wanted to do for your special day. You lifted up your toes to my face and asked me to kiss them. I want you to know, that even if it wasn't your Birthday, I still would've kissed them - because you have cute toes.

After your daycare party, we took you to your favorite toy store in Old Town. You know - the toy store that  makes you feel as happy as this -

Rody & Adeleigh (a few months back)

Your daddy and I are still laughing about the time today where you carried Rody into the book section. You set him in the middle of the floor, then grabbed a stuffed Abe Lincoln. You carried Abe over to Rody, set him on Rody's back and bounced him up and down a few times. Then you started frowning and yelling at Abe, "No, my toy. Me ride."
That was the end of Abe. He ended up face down on the floor while you and Rody bounced off into the sunset.

Next, we walked across the street to Beaujo's. You wouldn't let us into the restaurant until you were done dancing to the beat of the street performers. We're still not sure if the crowd started to form around them, or you - because there's just something completely magnetic about a carefree 2-year-old dancing on the street.
Then, you ate pizza, mac & cheese, and we let you blow milk bubbles through your straw without telling you to stop - because it's your Birthday.
Then, we went home, ate cupcakes and read you your new book until you fell asleep in my arms.

Day 1 was perfect.

Birthday Day 2

Today, I woke up to you yelling, "Momma. Mom. Mommy. Mum..."
I went in to pick you up, gave you a kiss and you said, "Momma, I poo-poo."
"Oh, that's awesome, Adeleigh!......
.....So, do you want to go to the farm for your Birthday Day 2?"
And you said, "Momma, Animals!"
So, we took you to the farm.

After your nap, we went to the park so you could play and eat cupcakes with your cousins and friends.

I still feel bad about the time I let you go down the slide without anyone to catch you. We've played at this slide before and usually, you go slow enough that no one needs to help you off at the bottom. But of course - this time - this one time, you shot down the slide like a rocket. And instead of slowing down at the end, you picked up speed. You were airborne for a split-second, skipped on your toes and landed on your hands and knees. I ran to the bottom as fast as I could, anxious and terrified because I didn't hear you crying below. Right as I got to you, you stood up, brushed your legs off, and looked up at me.
"Whoa, Adeleigh. Are you okay?"
"Yeah, Mommy. I okay."
Then, off you went again to the top. I hurried after you. You are fearless. And your Momma may need to reap the benefits of Xanax as a result. To calm my worries for now, Aunt Amy came to the bottom of the slide to catch you. And, of course that time - and every time following - you crept down slower than a snail.

You played with your friends all evening and wore yourself out. Then, you had a bath. This was how it ended-

Day 2 was fun.


Birthday Day 3

My intentions for today were to take you to Grandma & Grandpa's so you could resume playing with your cousins. Instead, Grandma came to you because Mommy had a migraine and Daddy had to work. You had so much fun with her. I could tell because of the incessant belly laughs and screams of joy coming from your new circus tent. My favorite part of today was when you came bounding out of your room and up to my bed. You had a piece of raspberry/peach pancake on a fork and said, "Here, Mommy. Eat."
Then you brought me your new recorder and said, "Here, Mommy. Flute." And you played your new harmonica while I hummed a few notes on your "flute." Then, I fell back asleep and you bounded back into your room to play and laugh some more.

When my migraine subsided and Daddy got home, the three of us snuggled on the couch while you sang us songs. Then, you fell asleep in my arms.

Day 3 was special.

~~~~~~~
I don't really know how to begin telling you how wonderful the last two years have been since you entered our lives. The love your Daddy & I have for you is hard to put into words. You amaze us. Every day. And you have really shown us the adventure and the joy that is found in every passing moment, even the difficult ones.
I don't know what your Daddy and I did to deserve such a blessing in our lives. But the last two years have been particularly special with you here.

Happy Birthday, Little One.

"Happy to you, Momma"

This evening, after all the lights were out, Daddy ran to make a quick grocery store run. I was resting on the couch, singing "Twinkle Twinkle, Little Star" with a sleepy Adeleigh on my lap. We were winding down from a busy, fun day with family. I looked down at her in the dark to see if she was sleeping. She peeked up at me, smiled and said, "Happy to you, Momma."

Now, I don't know if she was remembering having sung the Birthday song to her cousin & Grandpa earlier in the day. I don't know if Daddy whispered a reminder to her before he left. I don't know if she just somehow knew that when she wakes up in the morning, it will be her Momma's birthday. 

But, it was special nonetheless. 

I gave her a hug and we snuggled a little tighter. 

After a few minutes of quiet in the dark, I peeked back down at Adeleigh to see if she was sleeping. She looked up at me...................................Then, she started growling. She reached her chubby little fingers up and pinched my cheek. "Happy to you, Momma. Grrrrrrr." She pinched it again.

So, I don't know if my little girl thought she turned into a zombie for a few minutes and she was testing me for quality. I don't know if she thought I needed a little bit of rouge on my cheeks. I don't know if she knew her own strength and that it actually stung a little bit. 

But, it was special nonetheless.

She was the best belated-birthday gift I ever received.

Adeleigh vs. United Flight 349

As we prepared for Adeleigh's first flight, we sought as much advice from experienced parents as we could. We gave ourselves plenty of time, parked as close to the airport as possible and crossed our fingers that our sweet little girl would stay her sweet little self the entire trip to Florida. Then, we entered through the airport doors.

Meltdown (noun): the melting of a significant portion of a nuclear-reactor core due to inadequate cooling of the fuel elements, a condition that could lead to the escape of radiation

.

Source: Dictionary.com

For a few minutes, I thought they would evacuate DIA because of the explosively large amount of radiation that was beginning to loom around our family.
After we checked-in, we had to use the restroom. Phaeton went first. While inside, he could hear the toddler-fueled screams that I was desperately attempting to cool off. Adeleigh was writhing, hitting, throwing my glasses to the ground. Everyone passing by stared, mouths dropped, and walked in a perfect circle, approximately 50 feet in diameter around us, as she tried to escape me and run away to IcelandAir. Phaeton came out to find a wailing Adeleigh, refusing to be held, squirming on the ground, while I stood above her trying to soothe her and convince her that there was nothing for her in Iceland.
It was his turn to try.
As I walked into the restroom, I had to fight back the tears. I felt helpless. This was so out-of-character for Adeleigh and I knew it was our fault. She was overstimulated already, and in a new environment. And I found myself panicking, dreading the next 4+ hours, wondering how we would manage this one. Then, I rushed out to help Phaeton, thankful we were in this together. We were able to distract her long enough to get through Security and onto the train in peace. Then, we approached our gate just as they were starting to board.

Unfortunately for us, the moment where you decide to teach your child about patience and waiting your turn in line, shouldn't be at the airport. Also unfortunately for us, the moment you decide to heed your friend's advice and buy suckers for your little one's flight, should also not be at the airport.

With less than five minutes to board the plane, I left a radioactive toddler with my husband in line, and scrammed into three different stores to try and find suckers. Then, a lady pointed me to the Candy Shoppe, an obvious site for suckers, right? Not at DIA. All they had were the huge rainbow lollipops you see in Charlie & the Chocolate Factory, and See's chocolate/vanilla/espresso suckers. I bought a rainbow one and a chocolate See's sucker. Then, despite the fleeting thought that I would "accidentally" miss this flight and meet my family in Tampa, I rejoined the nuclear-reactor core a.k.a. Adeleigh.

We boarded the plane - the middle of the plane. When all of the people who surrounded us, paid hundreds of dollars for a nice, relaxing 3 1/2 hour flight across the country, they really had no idea what they were getting themselves into....

The first hour was perfect. Adeleigh did great during take-off. In fact, she helped calm me and my flying nerves. I gave her the chocolate sucker and within 5 minutes, Adeleigh and the entire space occupying 22 D, E & F had a thick layer of sticky, brown goo coating it. Then, when electronics could be turned back on, we pulled out the laptop and an Elmo DVD. That lasted for a few minutes, until she started ferociously banging on the keyboard. She managed to turn the volume up to the maximum setting during a scene where Elmo and all of his friends ferociously banged their cymbals together. How embarrassingly perfect that was. So, we shut it off.
Next, she made friends with the mother that was sitting behind us and somehow managed to acquire an entire bag of Chex Mix and Pretzel M&M's one mouthful at a time. (Don't worry: We bought the mother and her children some to replenish their supply.)
Then, she sweet-talked the Flight Attendants into letting her roam about the cabin when the "fasten seat belt" sign was turned off. She made friends with the entire back-half of the airplane and showed everyone her new pink shoes.
Then, the "fasten seat belt" sign was illuminated and everyone was instructed to return to their seats as soon as possible. We walked Adeleigh back to our chocolate sucker-covered row and tried to buckle her back into her seat.

Not happenin', Mom & Dad. Not after I just made 30 new friends that really like my shoes.

You remember that nuclear-reactor core meltdown that happened all throughout DIA earlier? Take that, but confine it to a 2-foot by 4-foot space in Row 22 D, E & F of an Airbus 319, 30,000 feet in the air.
Completely. And utterly. Catastrophic.

......

Still going.....

.......

Not done yet.....

.......

Then, we tried the rainbow lollipop. She hucked it directly onto the dirty floor.

.......

Here we go again.....

.......

.......

Approximately one hour later -

She fell asleep on the floor, underneath the chair in front of her own.

Immediately following the mid-air nuclear meltdown, everything on the plane went silent.
Then, Phaeton and I began celebrating our survival. We laughed. We cried. We hugged. We whispered to each other all of the things we wanted to accomplish together, now that we were given a second chance at life - so long as none of them required boarding an aircraft.
And even though the "fasten seat belt" sign stayed on for the remainder of the flight, Adeleigh's 30 new friends, plus everyone else on the plane, were smart enough to keep their mouths shut and let the youngest member of United Flight 349 do whatever, the hell, she wanted.

Beach Baby

For Adeleigh's first time to the beach, we felt it only appropriate to capture our memories by destroying our camera in the Gulf of Mexico. We felt it equally appropriate to destroy our back-up camera (a.k.a. Phaeton's phone) in the water too. Lucky for us, we had a back-up to the back-up. And you had better believe, we weren't leaving St. Pete Beach without photo proof.

More stories are to come of Adeleigh's first flight...